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    October 22

    起跑的终点线

    好久啦!?
    我真的是懒到啦一定的境界!懒到让我自己都惊讶!Müdes Smiley
     
    上一次的BLOG是7月份。现在是10月份,相隔啦3个月。
    三个月里面我从 

                           法国  

                                                        回到

                                                                  奥地利

                                                                   再回到那个熟悉得不能再熟悉的

                                                                                                       

                     经历了打工挣钱,

    回家,

          朋友结婚,

                     湖吃海喝,

                                马不停蹄忙着玩,在一个月以后又回到这个见证我青春的国家。

     

              算是有啦一个阶段性的成果吧。理当一直继续往前走,可是,身体里面总是存在着依附着的某一件东西不见啦。

                                                           回来有两个星期啦。

    布置新家,

                收拾妥当,

                             辞掉旧工作,

                                            找到新工作,

                                                           换啦新教授,

                                                                         准备考学位,

                                                                                       朋友保持联系

                                                 原男朋友结婚啦,新娘不认识,

                              周围的人走啦,

                     留下啦,

          准备走啦,

    决定来啦。

    我还是依然那么的懒,依然没有逛别人BLOG 的习惯。偶然想起,自己上来看自己的BLOG时候才发现,眼睛里面有一种叫做泪的东西不安分守己。想出来看看这个璀璨的世界,看看在我身边有那么多那么多关心我的人。尽管我懒得不去别人BLOG上串门。

    我从新回到这里。身边的一切,仿佛回到啦刚开始。一切都和原来是那么的相似。自己还是一个人,从零开始读课程,住双人间,就如同股市,经过一段时间的起伏灿烂后,最后平静,也许稳定,也许继续起伏,也许跌至低谷。是啊,一切都是那么的相似,可是,心中那种冲劲没有啦,它真的疲倦啦。虽然经过一个月的修整,可是 ,它依然不能如往常般眼中包含希望,往前冲。累啦吗?还是倦啦?又或许是懒啦?谁说得清呢?

    没有!!!

    唯一的,闭着眼睛,依附着感觉,往前探步吧!

    说真的,不愿意写BLOG。别人写BLOG都是很开心的。我一写BLOG就想不起开心的事情。不愿意把这样的情感传递给别人。

    很久很久以前有一个朋友看着我的眼睛告诉我,我的眼睛里面有一种神,让人看着会觉得有精神,有活力。是的,我承认,可是,昨天看看镜子里面的自己。感觉,熟悉,又陌生。就好像现在,站在这个起跑线上,一条熟悉又陌生的起跑线。我刚从线那头跨过来,可是仿佛根本就看不见前面的路,前面的方向。

    不过,还是那么一句老话。一切都会好的!不是吗??能做的不就是一如既往的往前走吗??

    GRAZ开始越来越冷啦。希望冷冽的风让我的脑袋清晰一点。让我知道,自己是谁?自己在哪?哪里是方向?

     

     

    Comments (2)

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    牛 牛wrote:
    哎,其实开心与不开心就在一刹那间,昨天的我还蛮开心的,今天又无缘无故郁闷了```这就是生活吧``人也就是在这种轮回中变得麻木,变得冷血```
    Nov. 4
    Fang YUANwrote:
    加油吧,彩虹就藏在那条线后头~~
    Oct. 23

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